Eulogy 2 - Keith Royal Maloney (aka Testro) (1922-2008)

THE DARK-HAIRED ACROBAT

(Eulogy written and delivered for Keith Royal Testro by Warren Maloney on Thursday, 10^th July 2008) ^[1]

 Well, Keith, you’ve brought in a good house today. And even though you would never have wanted it, we are here to celebrate being part of you and being part of your journey. You would have hated us to be sad – well we are sad, but we are also happy that we knew you and can today share the memories.

 Now I know as I begin this you would have been ducking out the back to play with the kids or the dogs, for you were indeed

 

A SIMPLE MAN USING SIMPLE MATERIALS TO PAINT RAINBOWS FOR ALL YOUR FAMILY AND FRIENDS

And we thank you for it.

You always seemed to have the power to sell us our dreams.

 It started very young when you, as a 5-year-old, and your 10-year-old brother, Rex, would hawk EUCALYPTUS branches door to door in Elwood – rarely revealed as stolen from the trees in the lane out back of the buyers’ houses.

Then there was the “stealing of the heart” of Jean, that beautiful young girl from Pyrmont. Dressed as you were in your soldier’s gear at the church dance, she saw her own “Tyrone Power”.

Jean’s Dad, the much-loved Bill “Porky” Byatt, reacted differently when Jean broke the engagement news. He took one look at the DARK-HAIRED ACROBAT and threw a loaf of bread at Jean. Enough said really.

The dark-haired acrobat and the husky voiced singer were married on 9^th February 1946 and next day left to join Wirth’s Circus.

What a wonderful time of rainbows – the Circus, Vaudeville, Pantomimes, travelling, laughing, singing, dressing as a clown – and in between “doing the pubs” as Grandpa Ron Testro called it.

 It was the same as selling eucalyptus branches but selling advertising space for the notices on the back of hotel room doors did allow a myriad of rainbows to be seen by the customers; and the business of “Doing the pubs” built to become Testro Bros. International and with its ups and downs was the backbone of the family for 60 years.

 Despite the hardships of business, the lovely colours of fun were the family. The births and childhoods of Wayne, Glenn, and Keith, together with the joys of travel and the various houses, filled the 50s and 60s and delivered many of the memories we are talking about today, Keith.

 How you loved the travelling, always travelling light, and returning home laden with “pressies for the kids”

 You were always a TEASE to your kids and their friends.  You would back-kick their bottoms as they walked beside you along the street and then with the most serious of faces pretend not to understand their concern. 

Wayne & Glenn & Keith jnr & Jean Testro - 1955 France

There is the lovely story worth retelling of “getting the kiss from Glennie boy” as he would go into school. Glenn was not shy as a youngster at fare welling or greeting his Dad with a kiss on the cheek and it was a ritual that Glenn would kiss you at the school gate. However, Keith, you knew that was becoming a problem to him as he neared his teens.

 So, on the fateful day when Glenn looked at his schoolmates and finally baulked at kissing his old man, you pouted, put on the sad eyes, and said, “OK Luv, I understand.” Of course, he had to kiss you and then keep his head down all the way past his friends into school. I reckon you loved every minute of that.

 You loved all your children and grandchildren often referring to them as “Boofheads” or as “Luv”. Your love was simple to understand and simple to return.

  Keith, you really were the White Rabbit with your total focus on punctuality – To be late was the gravest mortal sin. You had that down to such a fine art that the family were not only constantly rebuked for tardiness but got used to getting to venues an hour early – how embarrassing?

 Keith, how you loved the surprise and to be in control. Do you remember how when you retired from full-time work, you still wanted to, needed to, be in first on the Monday morning to open the mail and announce loudly and happily “how much dosh “was in the mail. It was your surprise, your thing.

 However, it took you some hours to forgive Blake when one day he beat you to the mail and announced to all there was “$7,000 in cheques”. After all, you were the painter of rainbows, not yet a title to pass on to your loved grandson.

And then there was GOLF.

 You were the Chairman of the Board on Sunday mornings and Thursday afternoons at Green Acres or Beacon Hills leading the team of SCOUNDRELS including Ray, Tommy, Alka, Terry, Peter, Kevin, and Jimmy. No one ever understood your handicap system, particularly when they had a good round but lost money

Keith Testro + Roy Maloney + Tommy Tyler - 1963

 You would make notes in THE BLACK BOOK and endlessly take the mickey out of each situation. Eventually, after exhaustive 19^th holes, usually in the Kellett Grove kitchen, all players would stagger home inevitably much later that their loved ones expected.

 It was never about great golf. It was always about great friendship and painting the rainbows for young and old.

For me, golf mornings were precious, but it was the Saturday afternoons at Carlton Football Club that were the most precious. My Dad, Ray’s, eyes would light so brightly as you his youngest brother, KIKKIE, joined him for the afternoon of drinking, rubbishing every possible Carlton player, making silly bets, teasing Hoppity Bob or Geoff or Tommy, buying non-stop chips and red lemonade for Wayne and me as we sat outside the pub afterwards (well past 6pm closing). You came to entertain and provide rainbows and you did just that.

 We loved so much about you – your love for dogs (especially the strays), your childlike enthusiasm for gadgets, for science fiction movies, your generosity, your energy, your simplicity.

 We love being able to celebrate all that and all the stories today. But we wish today had never come. Just one more wrestle, one more golf game, one more movie, one more Carlton win, one more sitting across the table sharing a beer.

We all would like to think that you have reached your end of the next rainbow – to catch up with Ron “The Old Boy”, Rex “Vok”, Roy “Tilden”, Ray “Sammy” and of course, everyone’s favourite, Bonnie. To act the goat in heaven’s backyard at another family get-together.

Wordsworth thought of you KIKKIE when he wrote

                     My heart leaps up when I behold

A rainbow in the sky

 You were a very special “dark haired acrobat” to all of us and we were very lucky to see the show

 

 

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[1] Keith Royal Maloney (Testro) (1922-2008) was the Husband of Jean Alice Testro (nee Byatt), and the Father of Wayne Kingsley & Glenn Beresford & Keith Sheldon Testro